Thursday, January 29, 2009

Three Weeks

Today marks three weeks since we lost our sweet Baby B and it's been the toughest three weeks of my life. Three weeks that I would not want to relive and that quite honestly, I am so glad are over. It's amazing how many emotions, lost milestones and countless reminders you can go through and be constantly surrounded by in as little time as three weeks and I know that there are just many, many more waiting ahead for us in the future. Although, I know that it will get better as time goes on and we are allowed to heal and accept the reality and the pain of our loss. It's just more than I can take sometimes now and it's always easier said than done.

At this point, I am mostly just looking forward to hopefully being able to be blessed again with another pregnancy quickly and to then start looking forward to new milestones, a healthy and happy pregnancy and God-willing, a healthy baby in my arms as the end result. We have been blessed with one healthy, amazing son that we both love so, so very much... he is our world, but we do want to have another child to share our love with. It's a fairly common and natural desire to want to give your child a brother or a sister and we want this so very badly. For me, so much that it hurts, especially after what we have lost. Now, looking forward, we can only hope and pray that we will be so blessed again to have another healthy child. I pray for this every day and every night and just hope that the Lord hears and answers our prayers.

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